Coming out of the Scary Closet. Part 6 Section C: I Meet Bud and he clarifies a Past Life for me.
So Jill and Steve road off into the sunset and I guess I must have teleported that motorhome up out of that sand pit….and I too was down the road.
It was kind of late so I just went a little ways that night to a trailer park that was either in or right on the edge of that Military Reserve. It was really interesting thrusting myself into this astral quagmire that that there trailer park just happened to be. Crazy energy everywhere….and there I was, unlike my normal self, smack dab in the middle of it. That night I had a dream that I was driving along and saw three dead owls on the side of the road. The next morning I got up and went to wash my clothes in the little Laundromat that was there. I put my clothes in then got em washed than put them in the dryer. Then I guess I went back to my motorhome for a while. After a while I went back and took out my clothes. As I was standing there with my laundry in my arms this huge Indian walks in the door. He ducked his head as he came in, he might have been Navajo, I remember he was triangular like Navajo’s. And he’s screaming and yelling and getting really crazy and violent in my direction like nothin I’d ever seen. It seems some of his laundry got mixed into mine. I don’t remember exactly what happened next…..it’s one of those things where in order to remember you have to be energetically in the same place, which I’m not right now, and have only been a few times since that episode with the Indian…..but whatever it was he ended up crying (from sadness) like a baby while I tried to console him. Then he kinda sobered up and I saw he was getting embarrassed, so I walked out the door.
Just then this Jeep pulls up, and I see hanging from the mirror a buzzards feather, but not just any buzzards feather, it was the “speed” feather (as I call it) from that buzzard that led me on the little exploration back at the camp, the one with the 90 degree bend in the end.
So I asked one of the soldiers where he got it, he said that it was strange, just earlier that day they were driving along and it fell right into their Jeep from out of the sky, then he asked me if I wanted it….. and I don’t know why, but I said no…. Then I went back to my Motorhome, and hit the road, heading south down I 5. So I’m cruising on probably cogitating on all the intense experiences I recently had…and all these questions were arising…kind of like a flood, one following the next. Then I saw it….an owl on the side of the road, I was cruising too fast and decided I’d get the next one, but there it was and I was still moving too fast, so I slowed down and kept my eyes pealed… There it was, the third owl. I got out, waited for cars to pass and went over to pick it up. ( I admit it, I was road kill guy, I liked feathers, and porcupine quills and armadillo and turtle shells, and there are places where these are as frequently found as beer cans on the roadside outside Redneck USA. ) So I went over there. It was a beautiful barn owl with a snake in it’s claws…and a mouse in the snakes mouth. They all seemed recently dead, so I bagged em all up.
Here is a photo of what I made from it, it’s pretty old now and kinda falling apart, but you can get the idea. In it’s beak it holds the snakes vertebrae, and below that are some of the mouse’s bones. ( I once won an award in an art show for it and got my pic in the local paper.)_
Now that was one of those memories that we humans are so good at suppressing, because when he told me that I just instantly pushed it aside, took any energy from it. But finally many years later (just a few ago)
I faced it, and what it was was that on that day when all my Brothers held their heads high, it wasn’t that I was bowing down, but rather I couldn’t bear to look in the mans face, so I bowed my head down…. And the damn sucker shot me anyway, which is cool, it was all part of the plan, or so my Teacher had said, of kind of splitting us all up, and spreading us all around the next time where we could do more good. It seems all over the world there were these little pockets, where certain groups of souls had always gravitated to carry on …. Spiritual pursuits, and there in Tibet we were working on subtle levels to bring about Peace and love in Humanity, but now somewhere somebody who had a lot more spiritual clout than I did, decided we needed to split up….so we weren’t supposed to take it too badly. But I took it real badly because my last thought was one of ultimate shame….because I thought that I had accidentally dishonored my Brothers and Teacher by bowing my head….. And I had pushed this aside to hide from myself, and all that energy I put towards keeping it hidden, just fed it more….and it grew in the dark into a demon that would taunt me from the shadows of my being….. But the fact that Bud exposed it, even though it was many years later when I allowed it, allowed me to face it in the Light of Truth, and release some of it’s hold on me. Though I still feel like I need to apologize and explain myself to my Teacher and Brothers….
Well like a bat hastily escaping Hell I flew out of that rock shop and on down the road.. Pretty darned freaked out by recent events and just wanting to crawl into a hole a while until the day I was to go home. But that wasn’t going to happen. I was about to meet the woman I saw superimposed upon Jills face, the same face that was on the angel that came to my room when I was 8 years old. She was going to show me something about "the cords of Man".And my magical friend Larry who somehow had known where I’d be showed up that night and got to see her too.
I’m afraid I’ve left out some major parts of the experience with Bud, but maybe sometime I’ll be vibrating at that frequency, and can share it in writing.